Tuesday, June 30, 2009

10. Sardine Rehearsal

We immediately went down to the huge stage where the remaining six of the famous Seven Sardines were just finishing a rehearsal.

The entire group came over--thrilling with excitement--to greet us.

One rushed a bit faster than the others and arrived breathlessly first.

"Is this the famous Constable Crab which is gonna track Mable down? Is it Sharko? Tell us QUICK!"

"Hi, Shoiley!" Sharko growled to the impetuous young sardine, "Yeah he's the one."

"Oh Constable Crab! We have heard SO much about you! Are you going to find Mabel and get her back before our big show?"

"I will do my..."

"Come on you sardines!" Sharko interrupted, "We got work to do!

"Well, at least you could introduce us!" sniffed the young performer.

"Shoiley, Crab.
Where's Cody?" continued Sharko in the same breath.

But by this time the rest of the sardine performers had arrived and they wanted to be introduced too.

"We ALL wanna meet the crab!" They squealed.

"OK! OK! Hold yer horses! Crab, this is Dagmar and Dougie and Sylvia and Ralph and Isabelle! Did I miss anybody? Now Come on! We got serious biznes. ya know--now WHERE'S CODY?!

"He was takin' us through our new routine just a minute ago." Shirley murmured cautiously--"I think when he saw you-all coming he excused himself and said he would be in his dressing room if he was needed."

The other musical sardines glanced at each other meaningfully.

"Well, he's needed NOW!" Sharko barkeled. "Come on Constable and Starry--lets see what dis character has to offer by way of info!"

And we headed backstage with Shirley tagging along behind us at a discrete distance.


Tuesday, June 23, 2009

9. The chase begins

"And where may ask is this "Cody Cod" person? If he IS the last to see Mabel, perhaps he can..."

"Ya wanna see Cody Cod does ya? Well 'ats no problem. I seen him down ta the Clam Shell rehearsing wit' da SIX sardines justa little while ago. He's probly still dare!"

"Then I think, my friends that we should go down to the Clam Shell as quickly as we can!"

And Starry, Sharko and myself hastened to that famous theatrical venue.


Monday, June 22, 2009

8 Sharko Blabs

"Dis is Monday, roight Mr. Constaboil Crab? And we got dis huge concoit at da Clam Shell on Satoidy, also roight? An deres several tousand tickets sold awready fur da show, also roight Mr Crab? An da customers wanna see dair fav'rite perfoimers da Seven Sardines, roight?

BUT da trouble is--DIS ONE SARDINE SKIPPED TOWN a couple a days ago! We got only SIX SARDINES!"

"All this I know and understand, Sharko. But I need some solid information--like who saw the missing sardine last? And, by the way, what is the name of this missing sardine--and what instrument did he or she play which is so important to the group?"

"Da sardine's name is Mable--an she's a girl sardine--and she plays da autoharp like no one else on dis planet!" Sharko was
more enthusiastic and animated than I had ever seen a hammerhead.

"An I'm purty sure the last one to see her was the choreographer fur da show, dat
creep Cody Cod !


Friday, June 19, 2009


"Jist a minute." said Sharko in what I saw was the only voice he had--a deep, loud, growly sort of voice--"What's dis gonna COST us, Crab?"

"Nothing--if I cannot find the missing sardine--and if I DO help you--you can pay me whatever you feel is right for the return of your musical friend."

"Oh--! That's mighty sharkish of ya, Crab. I always thought all cops was on the take--if ya don't mind my sayin' so--but you're a regular guy! Just like me!"

I considered the shark was giving me a huge compliment--so I merely said: "Thank you! Now let's get down to cases. I need to know everything YOU know about this sardine business."

"HAR!" Sharko ejaculated. "An' a foul, mixed up biness it is, Mister Crab!"


Thursday, June 18, 2009

6.Outside Father Neptune's

Outside Neptune's I was a bit surprised to discover that Starry's friend--the Manager of the Seven Sardines--"SHARKO" by name-- was in fact a hammerhead shark--not the prettiest denison of the deep, perhaps--but one that gets a LOT of respect. I

"Crab!" rumbled the shark, "Pleased ta meet'cha, I'm sure."

I could tell he was using his best manners and--what the heck--any friend of Starry's is a friend of mine.

"Likewise." I replied simply.

"Do this mean you're wid us?" Sharko asked.

"I will do everything I can to assist in finding your missing sardine." I said, formalizing our compact.


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

5. Need Some Facts

"I suppose, old friend, the first thing to do is to gather some facts as to the sardine's disappearance. Where do you think we should start?" I asked.

"I am SO relieved you decided to come on board on this investigation, Constable!

I think we should start NOW, because every minute we delay could have very grave consequences! And as for facts--I was so hopeful that you would help find the missing sardine that I brought the person with the most facts right with me--the Manager of The Seven Sardines, Daniel Sharky!

He is waiting right outside this restaurant and will he ever be happy to see YOU and to know that you are going to find that sardine!"

Now hold on, Starry," I cautioned, "I will do my best of course. but..."

"No "buts", Constable Crab! With YOU on the case--we'll find that sardine! Come on--lets go!"


Tuesday, June 16, 2009

4 Find the Sardine

"I don't know, Starry--I am extremely busy with my other duties as you know..."

"Constable, I don't ask you for many favors--but this is VERY important to all of us music lovers. The Seven Sardines are bigger than just about any other musical group in our time--they are LIVING CLASSICS!

You've just GOT to help us FIND THAT MISSING SARDINE!"

I had never seen poor Starry so upset. One sardine missing among the millions and trillions of sardines in the sea? Really!

But I also realized that I couldn't let this old friend down in what he thought was an emergency.

I pushed myself back from my excellent dinner--signaled Alfonse the Waiter for my check and rose from the table--touching my old friend affectionately on the shoulder.

"All right, Starry. I'm with you. Let's find that missing sardine!"


Monday, June 1, 2009

3. A Friend in Need

"I am distressed to hear it." I answered urbanely, "But why are you so excited and what difference could one sardine musician possibly make to me?"

"I am a BIG FAN of the Seven Sardines, Constable!

Their music is really much better than you think!

They are booked to play at the huge
CLAM SHELL CONCERT in just a few days and HUNDREDS of tickets have already been sold!

Their manager,
Daniel Sharky, who is a friend of mine, is desperate! He has to have ALL SEVEN SARDINES or his show will be a failure and he has requested ME to ask YOU to help find the missing sardine!"